Why did you wake up this morning?
Think about it, why did you wake up this morning? Is it because you HAVE to pay the bills? Because, you HAVE to go to work? You HAVE to go for your morning run? Have to do the chores, clean the house, attend a meeting… The list goes on!
Make a list! Right now - take two seconds out of your busy life & write down why you got out of bed this morning…
Are you happy with that list?
Now let me ask you this – did you get up because you HAD to or because you WANT to?
Read that again! HAVE to or WANT to!
Of course, there’s always going to be a few things in life that maybe we have to do but don’t particularly want to, but my point is you can replace the have’s with the want’s by taking control of your life – and your first step at doing that is finding your life purpose.
Some people know their life purpose, some don’t, some think they do until their questioned about it & some people don’t even know what it means.
Whichever you are – it doesn’t matter, because you’re about to learn everything you need to know about your life purpose in my simple, easy read self help blog…
You might not get it from just from this one article, but check in weekly to my self-help blog for free advice & tips of how you can change your mindset, improve & maintain your mental health & wellbeing.
I didn’t know my life purpose, I didn’t have a clue what it was until I read my first ever self help book around 7-8 years ago.
At this point in my life, I was young, I had a job, earning money, I partied with my friends all weekend & I was severely down!
Yes! I was anxious, depressed, worried about everything & anything. I covered it all up with a fake smile, fake sense of humour, alcohol & lived like a robot.
My life was insanity – I did the same thing day in, day out, expecting different results, hoping that the next day I would wake up feeling better – but I didn’t.
In fact, I got worse! Not dealing with it, keeping my anxiety, depression & low moods covered up was draining my energy – it drained me so bad that when I finally exploded it wasn’t just my mental health that was affected, my physical health got affected too… That’s another story that I'll share with my readers another time.
I’d tried lots of different medications & methods to try make myself better, but it was struggle. Younger, desperate me expected to take a ‘magic pill’ and it would all go away but that was just the start of a long recovery.
One of my first steps in becoming a better version of myself was self-books – I’ll make a list on a separate post of all the one’s I massively recommend!
I remember picking up on my first self-help books – ‘The Worry Trick’. It was easy to read, easy to follow – straight to the point, a bit like my style of writing.
I remember reading this first book & thinking ‘This is silly’ ‘ A book won’t make me better’. This wasn’t anything against the book – certainly not, in fact I always highly recommend this book to my clients now.
Then I went on to my second book ‘The secret’. Another book I love, read again & again and massively recommend.
Then I went on to my third book, and so on. Now I read self-help books as often as I can because they really do help.
One thing that nearly self-help book will teach you is your life’s purpose. Not all of them say this way, not all them tell you how to find it & not all of them explain it in the same way.
When I found the basic meaning of your life’s purpose which I believe is…
In a nutshell: The reason you get up in a morning; living your life to its full potential by doing what brings you happiness…
As some might say ‘Living your best life’
My life changed when I questioned my own life purpose,
Did I enjoy my job? Did I enjoy getting stupidly drunk on a weekend, drunk to the point I remember the night before?
Why was I getting out of bed in the morning?
Or should I say back then, why was I getting out of bed every morning feeling shit – dreading my days, dreading conversation, dreading been stood in the hair salon all day, dreading somebody simply asking ‘How are you today?’ because I knew what my reply would be a lie.
Reading about life purpose made me question everything and honesty it was one of the best things that happened to me, obviously it took some working on myself to work it out but once I did things started to change!
My life purpose gave me motivation, it made me want to change, I realised that to change I had to try new things and to try new things, I decided what new things they would be!
I found myself doing things I did as a kid, like writing again, trying to help others. I started living for myself!
Finding my life purpose opened up so many doors I didn’t know was closed & now I know why… because how could you possibly change the unknown?
Up until finding my life purpose I got out of bed on a morning because I HAD to go to work, I DIDN’T WANT to go to work, not that work anyway!
I did because people told me back then I couldn’t be anything but a hairdresser, I went because I HAD to make money. I HAD to make money because I HAD to go out every weekend – I didn’t know any different, everyone else went out plus the alcohol covered up feelings I didn’t want to talk about.
I was existing – not living!
How did I find my life purpose?
1. I decided I wanted to change my life! I accepted I wasn’t happy and wanted to change it! Accepting yourself or your situation is probably the first step in almost any kind of self-help you study, whether you're on a wellness journey, curbing an addiction or changing your life. Accept your current situation first!
2. I learnt to say NO! It was difficult at first, but I learnt to say no to most (not always – we’re not perfect!) things that made me feel uncomfortable or negative. I slowly started saying no to things I didn’t want to do!
3. I stated finding my own interests – I loved self-help books, I’d learnt about mindfulness, I loved the sound of it, So I started staying in on a weekend, saved my money & bought myself a mindfulness course that I didn’t realise back then was the first step into an amazing career change for me.
4. I started to make changes where I wasn’t happy, at this point I still wasn’t a 100% sure where I was going, but I kept changing jobs until I found one I loved.
5. I wised up! Knowledge is power! I qualified in mindfulness, then booked myself straight onto a mental health NVQ. After that I did a mindset growth course, then I studied mental health counselling, went on to start a life coaching course.
6. I surrounded myself with good, honest, loving people. I changed some relationships & stopped taking shit from people or stopped getting easy influenced by others. I stopped caring what others thought – within reason, I stopped comparing myself with others and anyone who tried to tarnish that – I removed from my life.
7. I trusted the process! It was scary, but it wasn’t as scary as the horrible thoughts I had going on in my head daily! I took me a good couple of years to find all this.
These are just a few examples of steps I took to find my life’s purpose, whilst working on this, I didn’t realise just how much I was working on myself!
Anxiety was slowly getting better, depression pretty much gone because when you find your true life purpose it motivates you! It excites you! It gives you the push you needed to get your life in order because its yours.
It's your life & when you live it the way you truly want you experience nothing but satisfaction & refuse to take anything less.
Sure, it’ll might be tough but it’ll be worth it!
You’ll still have bad days but you’ll learn how to overcome them, the more you learn about yourself!
My life purpose now is to be loved & spread love, I do this through my fiancé – who was once actually my ex (right person, wrong time) but with the right time, we found our way back to each other, I find this in my now amazing friends, family.
I live to be successful – successful in making other’s life’s a little brighter by helping people the same way I helped myself.
I work because I WANT to! I love my job, my business & my career.
I earn money because I WANT to eat in a new restaurant when I fancy, I WANT to experience a weekend adventure, travel the world and so on.
I value happiness, love, trust, respect & most of all ME!
I live my life the way I want, not everyday is absolutely level 10 amazing & I’m not pretending I never have a down day or a bit of anxiety from time to time but I know how to get out of it now, I know what makes me happy, more positive, more motivated – I know what gets me out of bed on a morning…
I’ll ask you again, make another list…
What gets you out of bed on a morning?
Work out your life purpose – live not exist!
And if you need a little guidance, drop me a message & book yourself one of my support groups or one-to-one sessions, tailored around your needs & life...
Everything I teach is has been tried & tested by myself with proven results.
Remember to follow my blog, so you get a notification for your next self help read.